that up close. that tender. that intimate. that open. i realize not everyone cares for love, put under a microscope but a part of me believes deeply that if the world as we see it - stars, moon, earth, water and all of God’s wonder all directly stem from love, then … don’t we? i don’t think love is learned but rather unlearned and retaught. but it’s something that is always there and we just have to do the work to uncover how deep that love flows within us. shit … if i’m being honest, for me … on my best days? i feel like that shit is endless. like a well of sorts that goes through the ground and comes out the other side. i wish there was something else i could do but love. it’s so second nature that a lot of my inner work has to do with pacing myself so i’m claiming that here. as a work in progress, i don’t want it unless it wants me - tenfold. i wanna choose that for myself, you know. i feel like 25 years from now when i look at my life partner with loving, wise eyes, i desire to be able to see him as one of my greatest decisions and i want to sustain that “with a shadow of doubt” sensation on some forever-ever shit. if it’s fair for me to say. shit, i deserve it. not to rehash but seven years is time too long spent in the arms of a person who can only hold you for so long, word to Amy. so, i can say with confidence i am working on and taking every precaution possible to live this life thing well & intentionally. because these are my choices. this is my world. and this my heart to love with.