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The past six months I have tried to make a home out of my own body. I have stayed out of cameras and haven’t snapped it up as often. I also haven’t posed for full body pictures as much either, because this process is tedious. Finding a home in a body where you almost feel disassociated from is hard work. Everything in society animalizes + infantilizes the black plus sized body. We are either a joke or something to be feared. Then you get fetishiszed - ppl love big girls. Spare me the different narratives. The most important thing a big girl/plus size girl can do for herself is find a home within her own skin. The best thing we can do is hold ourselves at night and find a deep appreciation for our entire humanity, sans the arms of someone holding you at night. Someone to love you minus the memes and outside of the trends. Someone to care about your well being and often times, that person is yourself. and that is what I have figured. no one will tell me I am worthy, that i am beautiful and that I matter if I don’t internalize it myself. Happy BGAD, xo!